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X Men : The Last Stand - (Film) 
I am Alan Turner, I am an X man, I am a mutant, I have the special power of doing impressions of famous people, or as Frank Spencer would say, "ooh betty"
Or Tony Blair would say, "well"
I did not appear in this film, I was on holiday and missed it all, I was sad to miss all the funerals.
Us X men like the quiet life, but that flipping Magneto spazmo always causes trouble, or as he would say, "join us Charles etc"
I like Wolverine, we live next door and he laughs when I do impressions of Ronald Reagan, he stabs things with his big claws and he smokes cigars, he really stinks most of the time and does ploppy farts when he wakes up.
The only good thing about him is that he is angry sometimes and goes all stabby.
Storm is rubbish, she has white hair and can change the weather, she is the worst one, she is famous in the school for being the useless one who cannot act.
Bobby the iceman has a icicle willie.
We came under threat again, by Jean Grey, she is now a glowing lady who can blow people up with her mind, bang!
or as Jack Bauer would say, "bang!"
She is killing us and has joined Magneto and his friends to get rid of us for good.
Luckily it all worked out in the end, I cant say what happened as I was in Wales visiting my plumb farm, so I have no idea.
Alan.
xxx
Rating: 3/5
By Alan Turner : The Impressionator
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