Where's Jonesy

	Subscribe
	Follow

The Side Five
24/08/10

Hey Arnold
10/08/10

Booze
13/07/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Cars
17/05/10 Average Rating: 3 out of 5

And where the hell have I been ?
22/04/10

i, prejudice
27/02/10

Oddie Watch
02/02/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Back in the Day
25/01/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

End of Year Survival Guide - Part Three
24/12/09

End of Year Survival Guide - Part Deux
12/11/09 Average Rating: 4.3 out of 5

Bah Humbug Its Halloween
31/10/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Codename Puffin
04/10/09

The Good / Bad Old Days
06/09/09

Could This Be The End ?
25/08/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Stones
19/08/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Where's Jonesy
10/08/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

t-5
03/07/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Perfect Day
23/06/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Hamilton Khaki
16/06/09 Average Rating: 4.5 out of 5

Time to get away
09/06/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

New Series of Knight Rider Faces Budget Cuts
28/05/09

A Long Sentence
20/05/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Zombie Hunting Season
17/04/09

Hoffman Lenses
06/04/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Bob Hope Random Holiday Generator
03/04/09 Average Rating: 2.5 out of 5

The Good Life ?
24/03/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Turquoise Star
19/03/09 Average Rating: 4.7 out of 5

Visiting Earth ?
10/03/09 Average Rating: 4.3 out of 5

A Reason To Travel Back In Time And Kick Your Dad In The Bollocks
27/02/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

This Never Happened To The Other Fella
10/02/09 Average Rating: 4.7 out of 5

Eating Out
02/02/09 Average Rating: 4 out of 5

The Vatican Devil
28/01/09 Average Rating: 4.8 out of 5

The Big Bang Scam
21/01/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

The Times They Are A Changin’
19/01/09 Average Rating: 5 out of 5

Where's Jonesy

10/08/09

David Attenborough writes -

For the past 30 or so days a team of crack bbc camera men and psychologists have been tracking the migratory patterns, rituals and mating habits of an individual known only as lego Indiana jones.

Our journey started on a frosty summers morn’ in the kingdom of the united. Our subject; recently emerged from his bolt hole and unaware of the camera crew, sound technicians and equipment stood in front, to the side, behind and above him moved slowly from his tax free haven to the kitchen.
There he stood motionless on his hind legs kneading his testicles. For a moment Clive, our assistant tea lady thought he was on to us but eventually it became clear he was attempting to work out the mechanics of the fridge door.
After clawing aimlessly at the door for several minutes with his opposable thumbs he then attempted to snuzzle the door open with his nose. If he carried on doing this we would run out of film so Clive decided to break the prime directive and poke the fridge open with a stick. Unfortunately this caused us to break cover as the creature wandered over to us to investigate our presence. Clive was the nearest and therefore the first one to experience it’s pungent odour.
It was then that the creature opened it’s speaking hole for the first time.

It’s hard to explain what noise came form it’s underdeveloped vocal capabilities but it sounded something like, “It belongs in a museum”
Luckily our communications expert, also called Clive was at hand and with his vast knowledge of ancient dialects and such, he was able to deduce that the creature was talking in, ‘Film’; a relatively new language spoken by those amongst us who watch way way too much t.v. Clive was also able to deduce that the creature had spent the previous evening watching one or all three of the older Indiana Jones films. Clive concluded that the creature had not seen the last Indiana Jones film because it hadn’t taken it’s own life.

“Listen lady”, it spoke. . . . .; Was this a direct attempt at communication with Clive.
“This never happened to the other fella”; . . . . .Sadly no.

As we followed the creature around we learned it had an amazing dialect of over fifty phrases; Forty eight of them seemed to be from old Bruce Willis films, the rest were known to have originated from medium budget action movies or the film Deep Rising.
Deducing the style of film this creature entertained we set up an action scenario with a damsel in distress to see how it would react; however the creature simply looked confused and when it noticed a member of the opposite sex, froze for a second before going red and disappearing without a trace.

He is yet to return to his lair. . .

Follow Lego Indina Jones (GadgetFingers) on Twitter

Comments about This Article

Oh......What now!!! What are you looking at??? Comment By: Finnegan from Deep Rising, 11 Aug 2009, Rating: 5/5

Comment on This Article Your comment will be added automatically once you click on submit.
Your name:
Comment:
Overall Rating out of Five: ZeroOneTwoThreeFourFive