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Someone Else Holding the Baby Blues
11/01/12 Average Rating: 3 out of 5
Back to the Future Too
30/12/11
Untold Cooper
29/12/11
A British Defence Against America
08/12/11
Not So Marvellous
07/12/11 Average Rating: 3 out of 5
We need to talk about Gervais
19/10/11 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
A Quarter Life Crisis
06/10/11 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
Confessions of a Dangerous Mind
05/10/11 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
An open letter to George Lucas.
01/09/11
Burn Hollywood Burn
19/07/11
The Apprenticed
18/07/11
In Praise of ITV
03/07/11
Sick
28/06/11
Know the Drill
03/06/11
Modern Cinemas are Rubbish
02/06/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
My Tooth Story
26/05/11
Game of PWNS
24/05/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
West is West
19/05/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Crime Crime Crime
17/05/11
The Bored Room
11/05/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
The Future Shock
09/05/11
The Worm That Eats Itself
06/05/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
The Life Atwatic
24/04/11
Driving Like A Dick
17/04/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
A Penny For My Thoughts
27/03/11 Average Rating: 2 out of 5
The Needle and the Damage Done
23/03/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
The Meaning of Life Part 1 : Birth
16/03/11 Average Rating: 3 out of 5
10 O Clock Dive
21/01/11 Average Rating: 4.3 out of 5
Falling off of the Witches Hat
19/01/11 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Small Talk
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The Waiting Game
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2011
05/01/11
2010
31/12/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Police Stop
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Z Cast
29/12/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
The Crazy Adventures of Bastian and Atreyu
09/12/10
A note to my son or daughter.
08/12/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Baby I can drive your car
22/10/10 Average Rating: 4.3 out of 5
A Good Society
10/09/10
The National Sport of Rubbernecking
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Scanners 2
08/09/10
What mean Expendable?
07/09/10 Average Rating: 4.3 out of 5
Adventures in Babyhaving
06/09/10 Average Rating: 0 out of 5
Warning : Speculation
12/07/10 Average Rating: 4.5 out of 5
Adventures in driving
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A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
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Pipe Up
23/04/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
More Bard News
21/04/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
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Grumpy Old Deathwish
29/03/10
The Apple
27/03/10 Average Rating: 2 out of 5
1987
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The Long Bad Wednesday
25/03/10
Art for Art's Sake
23/03/10 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Modern Slash
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A Little Bit 'Special'
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Dead Happy
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Video Killed The Radio Stars
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Sunday Zoo
01/03/10
Im Flugzeug
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Radio Times
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16/02/10
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15/02/10
A Load of Pony
25/01/10
I Want To Lie Down With A Lion
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'You Lecherous Moron'
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A National Treasure
15/01/10
Snow
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Steaks are High
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Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em
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BBC Bashing
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Kenny Effing Powers!
09/11/09
No More Heroes
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What I Did In My Holidays
04/11/09
Jellyneck
22/09/09 Average Rating: 3 out of 5
Can Buy Me Love
10/09/09
Memory Lane
27/08/09 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
Shitting Stars
26/08/09
The Life and Death of My Pop Star Life
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Are You Being Offended?
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My Generation
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Home Alone 2 : Lost In 1939-1945
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Home Alone
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Context
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Summer is a bummer
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Time Waster
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Yes, but how did it Happen??
25/07/09
He Must Have Some Agent
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Day 2
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A New Morning
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The Sadness
21/07/09
Who Punishes The Punisher?
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The New Blog
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06/04/09
It's The End Of The World As I Know It
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Picture This
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Size Matters
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I Am Modern Man
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Watched
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Wired
08/03/09
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A New Breed of Hero
21/01/09 Average Rating: 4.2 out of 5
You Be The Judge
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Take Hart
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What's In A Name?
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Don't Remake Me Over
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Random Fluctuations In The Space Time Continuum!
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The Future Is Already Written
07/01/09
The Shortest Story Ever Told
06/01/09
Demon Seed
03/01/09 Average Rating: 4.5 out of 5
2008
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What's Cooking?
29/12/08 Average Rating: 3.8 out of 5
A Feel Good Story
21/12/08 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
The Curse
19/12/08 Average Rating: 1.8 out of 5
He's Not The Messiah!
15/12/08 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
Who throws a shoe?
14/12/08
Sneaky Christmas
10/12/08
Feeling Blu
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SHT
07/12/08
Gategate
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Comedy of Errors
30/11/08 Average Rating: 3.7 out of 5
For What It's Worth
27/11/08 Average Rating: 2 out of 5
Alan Partridge and Other Less Successful Characters
23/11/08
National Expression
20/11/08 Average Rating: 3 out of 5
A View To A Job
18/11/08 Average Rating: 1 out of 5
Last Bus Gone
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Jungle Nobodies
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The Cage Strain
11/11/08
A Common Practice In Poland
07/11/08 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
Close Encounters of the West Country Kind
06/11/08 Average Rating: 5 out of 5
David Brent Would Vote For Barack Obama
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I am Legend
04/11/08 Average Rating: 4 out of 5
Setting The President In The Art World
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My Word Is My Bond
02/11/08
A Load of Pony
Rock & Chips
25/01/10
Prequels can be very hit and miss. One man's Godfather Part 2, can be another man's Phantom Menace. But I think there can be no doubt, that on the whole, they are merely an example of ideas running low, or, in most cases, an excuse to make more money or stretch a long dead franchise out.

Take, Rock and Chips for example. Rock & Chips is a British comedy-drama and a prequel to the situation comedy Only Fools and Horses. The sitcom story focused on the lives of local villain Freddie Robdal, Joan and Reg Trotter and their teenage son Del Boy in the 1960s.

Wow. What a confused programme. It wasn't sure if it wanted to be a drama or a comedy. As a consequence of this, it failed on both attempts. It wasn't interesting enough to be a drama, nor funny enough to be a comedy. It felt like a really bad episode of "Heartbeat".

The main point of a prequel is to flesh out events that have been hardly touched upon in the original piece. There have been a few attempts to do this on television. The main one that always springs to mind is "First of the summer wine". Whilst it wasn't ground breaking of that good, at least it gave a background to our main protagonists that we were hitherto unaware of.



The problem with doing this with Only Fools and Horses is that, I think pretty much every episode talks about the past. The later series' were almost obsessed with mentioning Freddie Robdal and the fact that he was Rodney's father. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think the fact that Trigger is stupid, Boycey is tight and Roy Slater is officious has also been touched upon. When I say touched upon, I actually mean mentioned in almost every episode.

As you can see by this clip, they obviously don't tire of mentioning that Boycey is tight, as they have been doing it since 1960. Urgh.



One confusing piece of casting was Nicholas Lyndhurst as Freddie Robdal. I realise that Lyndhurst had played him in a photo in the original series, but I just kept thinking that it was Gary Sparrow from Goodnight Sweetheart trying to bang another barmaid. I was waiting for him to claim he had written loads of Beatles songs.



I wouldn't have minded a prequel, as an idea, if it was something that we hadn't seen before. But, it wasn't, it was just very dull. It would have like making a prequel to Star Wars, but telling us everything we already knew, having almost every character already have known each other , or have already met previously and lacking any charm, wit or intelligence. Oh hang on...

I can only presume that when coming up with this idea, John Sullivan must have just watched the Star Wars prequels.

I wanted to like it, I am a fan of Only Fools and Horses, but it was very flat, unimaginative and quite frankly, dull.

The only moment that stood out, for wholly wrong reasons, was this moment I have included below. A bit of back story. Del's mum thinks she has been made pregnant by Freddie Robdal (I know you know, I knew, but they still based I whole fucking 1 hour and 30 mins programme around it!).

So, she goes to a pregnancy testing centre and decides to use a secret name so no one will know it's her. She is reading a book about a character called "Gloria Ming". So, she uses that name. Her friend asks why she didnt use the name "Smith"? Del's mum says that everyone uses the name Smith. The man comes out and (exactly as I had predicted some 5 minutes earlier, this is how bad the comedy is in this folks!) asks for Smith and all the women, except Del's mum, look up. Hilarious stuff, eh?

Anyway. So, when it comes the turn of Del's mum, the man reads her name out as "Minge". Yes, that's right. Minge. He even says, and I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "Minge? Are you minge? I'm looking for Minge!"

I wont mention the "COCK!" "It's Cook" joke that follows. It is beneath us all.

Please see 7 mins and 35 seconds into this clip:



Yes. It was that bad. I hope there isn't a series.

Sickness update. I went to the doctor this morning as I still feel rough, still can't taste or smell and am still getting really bad migraines and sore eyes. It was a really nice Doctor this time. Not the miserable bastard from last time.

He checked my throat and said that it was heavily infected and inflamed. He then checked my ears and said they were full of fluid (Urr). He told me to rest for a few days and avoid going to work, until the infection calms down, and put me on a course of antibiotics. Here's hoping that I can feel normal again in 2010.

I am off to write a prequel based on that visit to the doctor.

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