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A LOOK INTO INDEX A Look Into Cosmology, Quantum Birectol Displacement, and other ramblings with Sir Donald Sinden A Look Into The Rolling Stones with Windsor Davies  A Look Into Why I Need to Use Wet Look Gel with Ian McShane A Look Into The Mysteries of the Universe with Martin P. Daniels  A Look Into my reaction to the end of long running science fiction shows with lego indiana jones  A Look Into being a crackpot with Klaus Kinski  A Look Into Going To The Toilet Outdoors with Bear Grylls   A Look Into The Seedy World of Underground Sports with Trevor McDonald  A Look Into Saving The Fish with Ted Danson  A Look Into Area 51 with Larry Hagman  A Look Into Cross-Dressing with Eddie Izzard  A Look Into pathalogical lying with Steven Seagal  A Look Into Cooking with Richard Griffiths  A Look Into getting kicked in the bollocks with Michel Lonsdale  A Look Into Shooting Monkeys with Kelsey Grammer  More...

A Look Into The Seedy World of Underground Sports with Trevor McDonald Hello, my name is Trevor McDonald, the famous newsreader, Knight Of The Realm, slayer of the Paxman Dragon and current guardian of the Excalibur sword, and I'm here to give you, my humble homies, a view of the seedy world that is underground sports. Having spent much time hanging out with my best friend Ross Kemp, I decided that it was time that I too delved under the surface of regular life and exposed to you, the serfs that dwell in the less good bits of the country (i.e. anywhere that isn't my fabulous goldplated mansion) a view of how the immoral and less rich people than myself spend their time. I took twelve months of my life hunting out underground sports and pastimes and what I found shocked even me (and I've seen Phillip Schofield's cock in the ITV changing rooms). Kitten Stabbing I found this grotesque sport being played deep in the Amazon jungle not 5 minutes by A road from junction 26 of the M1. A hungry orphan is given a rusty kitchen ladle, put in a ring with a spiteful, ill tempered kitten and told to fight to the death for a bowl of Tuna fish (in Brine or Sunflower oil - the winners choice). Of the two matches I could stomach watching, the kitten won both times. I became enraged and killed the kitten with Excalibur, then beheaded the ring leader/organiser of the event. Clubbing The Celebrity Chef People in deep in the heart of the Congo, not five minutes by A road from South Mimms services on the M25, participate in a rather evil sport known only to the locals as Clubbing The Celebrity Chef. 12 naked men, greased up with Extra Virgin Olive Oil kidnap a famous chef, set him free in the countryside armed only with a copy of the latest Hollyoaks calendar, and proceed to hunt him down to the death. The prize - a meal for two at the nearest Harvester restaurant. Disgusting. I could only stomach being involved for half an hour. When I tried to leave the hunt I was confronted by a group of men brandishing rolling pins. Fortunately Excalibur made light work of them. It is believed that national treasures such as Gordon Ramsey and Jamie Oliver are at risk. The Para-Olympics Cruel, cruel times are to be found in China this year (not 5 minutes by A road from junction 10 of the M42) where people with disabilities are made to compete in all manner of sports for the pleasure and delight of the able-bodied. This event is televised globally. Terrible. I became enraged and took Excalibur to my Television set. My wife says I have to go to bed now. Nothing written on this site is intended to be true or factual, and none of the celebrities named in the 'Look Into' section have anything to do with this website. Their 'contributions' are entirely fictional and have been created by the authors of Hobo-Bonobo. The opinions expressed on Hobo-Bonobo.co.uk are not those of anyone, particularly not the people to whom they have been accredited. Comments about This Article Kenny...yes I'm currently talking to Living + 1 about a celebrity ghost based golf series, featuring Yvette Fielding & myself, recently I've spent too much time living in the shadow of my daughter. Comment By: Jimmy Tarbuck, 03 Oct 2008, Rating: 3/5 Hey, still in the bunker eh Tarby? You're worse than Hitler you are! Arf arf. Comment By: Kenny Lynch, 02 Oct 2008, Rating: 5/5 Hey Tarby, are we on for the new series of full swing or what 'cos Lenny Bruce reckons his golf has improved. Comment By: Ronnie Corbett, 02 Oct 2008, Rating: 5/5 I happened to be in the club house during the Para-Olympics golf competition & was somewhat embarrassed to watch each competitor check in, only to be asked by the man behind the desk what their particular handicap was....bloody disgraceful!! Comment By: Jimmy Tarbuck, 02 Oct 2008, Rating: 2/5 Comment on This Article Your comment will be added automatically once you click on submit. Your name: Comment: Overall Rating out of Five: ZeroOneTwoThreeFourFive Back to Index Page | What's New | Search | Links | Link to Us | Feedback | Contact Us | Site Map The opinions expressed on Hobo-Bonobo.co.uk are not those of anyone, particularly not the people to whom they have been accredited. The content of the site is intended to be humourous, and is not intended to offend anyone.