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A LOOK INTO INDEX
A Look Into Cosmology, Quantum Birectol Displacement, and other ramblings with Sir Donald Sinden   Average Rating: 2.5 out of 5
A Look Into The Rolling Stones with Windsor Davies  Average Rating: 2.7 out of 5
A Look Into Why I Need to Use Wet Look Gel with Ian McShane  Average Rating: 2.3 out of 5
A Look Into The Mysteries of the Universe with Martin P. Daniels  Average Rating: 2.8 out of 5
A Look Into my reaction to the end of long running science fiction shows with lego indiana jones  Average Rating: 4.5 out of 5
A Look Into being a crackpot with Klaus Kinski  Average Rating: 5 out of 5
A Look Into Going To The Toilet Outdoors with Bear Grylls   Average Rating: 2.5 out of 5
A Look Into The Seedy World of Underground Sports with Trevor McDonald  Average Rating: 2.3 out of 5
A Look Into Saving The Fish with Ted Danson  Average Rating: 3.1 out of 5
A Look Into Area 51 with Larry Hagman  Average Rating: 2.2 out of 5
A Look Into Cross-Dressing with Eddie Izzard  Average Rating: 2.5 out of 5
A Look Into pathalogical lying with Steven Seagal  Average Rating: 2.5 out of 5
A Look Into Cooking with Richard Griffiths  Average Rating: 3 out of 5
A Look Into getting kicked in the bollocks with Michel Lonsdale  Average Rating: 2.7 out of 5
A Look Into Shooting Monkeys with Kelsey Grammer  Average Rating: 3 out of 5
More...
A Look Into pathalogical lying with Steven Seagal
Hey, I'm Steven Seagal, Dr. Seagal if you like or professor or Sir Seagal after my recent knighthood. Either way I'm taller than you and that makes me feel good because my hair looks like a lavatory brush. You may be thinking how a man who started life as Lee Majors' stunt double in the Fall Guy got so far so fast. We'll I'll tell you how; lie, lie and lie some more. In fact never stop telling porkies, ever. And that's why I'm prime minister and your not.
Recently I was the first man on Mars. When I got there they asked me to be their king but I turned them down for I am only a simple Buddhist ninja and dialogue coach to Pauley Shore. However they insisted and renamed their planet Stevesworld like that film Westworld which I also wrote, directed and starred in with Richard Benjamin. Further more you should be thanking me for helping God with a few suggestions like poseable thumbs and eyes because without them we'd not be able to turn the telly on to channel 5 for my next straight to tv release. Anyway God fell out with me when I discovered the dinosaurs which contradicted how he thought you humans turned up on Earth. He's just a chancer; he was way out and he knows it. In fact whilst in Poland filming my latest blockbuster as an ex cia assassin some local peasant villagers brought a small child to me with a terrible illness; I think it was the mumps. Needless to say knowing the secrets of the universe I cured the boy and soon all of Poland knew me as Saint Steven, patron saint of the universe.
I'd like to see Gary Busey do better than that.
Never forget; I am better than you but if you do forget I'll come round yours and bitch slap you silly.
Yours truly

Saint Sir Steve. Md. hons. Ba. + everything else. .
Nothing written on this site is intended to be true or factual, and none of the celebrities named in the 'Look Into' section have anything to do with this website. Their 'contributions' are entirely fictional and have been created by the authors of Hobo-Bonobo. The opinions expressed on Hobo-Bonobo.co.uk are not those of anyone, particularly not the people to whom they have been accredited.

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Comment By: Kelly Le Brock, 22 Sep 2008, Rating: 5/5

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He promised me lots of acting roles in return for a fumble of my heaving breasts, but once I had let him juggle with my knockers he never returned my calls..
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